~108~ Monthly Updates & 100 Day Celebration

I’ve honestly been meaning to post about Ethan turning 3 months old for - well, a month now. But, as a new mom, life.happens. and I just never got around to it.  The little guy finally decided to take a real afternoon nap for once though, so here I am with his 3 and 4 month update.

3 Months

Weight: We didn’t have an appointment this month. When I took him to Mommy and Me class, he weighed about 11LBS. 

Eating Habits: Ethan is still eating about every 3 hours (sometimes a little less, sometimes a little more). At the end of May, he was bottle-fed pumped milk when my dad and Jake’s mom watched so I could go back to work at the end of the school year and he was eating about 3-4oz at each feeding . I have to give a lot of props to moms who exclusively pump. I did it twice a day for 2 weeks and that was more than enough for me!

Sleeping Habits: Ethan is now 100% transitioned to sleeping in his crib at night. Miraculously, Ethan started sleeping through the night the night before I went back to work. He slept from 10pm-5am!! It’s like he knew that mama needed her sleep. This has continued ever since, with only a few nights waking up once around 3 or so. Fingers crossed he’ll keep it up!

Activities: Ethan enjoys playing on his playmat and has gotten good at batting at the stuffed animals hanging down. He isn’t really grabbing things yet, but I have a feeling he’ll get there soon! Twice a week, Ethan goes with me to tutoring; and running errands has gotten a lot easier now that he can easily be carried in the Ergo. 

Favorite Things: Bath time! He loves it now. We give Ethan a bath on Sunday and Wednesday nights before bed. It is always a fun and relaxing time for him. After we’re doing washing everything, we take him out of his bath chair and let him float around and “swim” in the tub on his back.  I hold the back of his head to keep it above the water line, but everything else is free in the water. 

He also really likes when people look down at him when he’s laying in his crib or on the changing table and will often smile back at us. 

Least Favorite Things: Tummy Time. I’ve been bad at getting this in because he dislikes it so much. I need to be a tougher mom and make him do it everyday. Sometimes he won’t even try to lift his head (even though he can definitely do it) and will just put his face into the mat and cry.

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Shortly after Ethan turned 3 months old, we celebrated him turning 100 days old on June 14.

 This milestone (Baek-il, 백일) is celebrated in the Korean culture as a sacred time of nurturing for both baby and mom to ensure good health and longevity, as historically the survival rates would drastically increase after a baby's first 100 days of life. To protect mom and baby, they would stay in the house until the baby was 100 days old. On this day, family and friends gather together to give thanks and to share in traditional food and rice cakes. The rice cake represent purity and perfection, and it is believed that the more people it is shared with, the longer life the baby will have.

To celebrate Ethan’s Baek-il, I made a traditional steamed rice cake and other traditional Korean foods for Jake’s parents, brother and his girlfriend, and uncle.  

We had bulgogi, mandu, and rice cake soup (which I had never made before).  It all turned out great and there were no left overs to be found!  Since I hadn’t made the rice cake before and had read that it was an acquired taste, I decided to pick up some gourmet cupcakes as well from a local bakery, Cache Bake Shoppe. Normally, it would kill me a little bit inside to buy cupcakes vs. making them, but with everything else I was making, it was a relief not to have one more thing to have to worry about and prepare.  And I really can’t complain - they were delicious! Even though I didn’t make the cupcakes themselves, I did make some cupcake toppers with Ethan’s name in hangul and his picture. 

Happy 100 days Ethan!!

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4 Months

Weight: 12lbs, 2oz (up 2LBs, 2oz from his 2 month appointment).

Length: 23.5 inches long

Eating Habits: Now that we’re fully back home for the summer, Ethan is back to being 100% breastfed, which is still going great! At his 4 month appointment, his pediatrician said that he could start trying rice cereal and purees if we want to. I picked up a box of rice cereal that night and got his high chair all set up. He loved his new chair, but wasn’t so sure about the cereal. 

We’ll try again in a week or so. At this point in time, we’re just experimenting with things. Once he’s about 6 months old, we’re going to try baby-led weaning to actually introduce solids. 

Sleeping Habits: Ethan is still a great sleeper (knock on wood).  We’ve got a great bedtime routine going and he is consistently sleeping about 10-11 hours overnight. He’s not much of a day-time napper though. After about 12:00, he doesn’t really sleep much until he goes to bed around 9. 

Activities: Being mom’s muse for her new DSLR camera! I’ve gone a little picture crazy, but how can you not when you have the most adorable photo subject?!

Ethan also went on his first “camping” trip at Mikey’s Acres over 4th of July weekend. This special place is dedicated to Ethan’s namesake and Jake’s best friend who we lost 6 years ago April. 

Favorite Things: Kicking his new piano under his playmat. He’s quite the musician! Bath time, and watching mom and dad. 

Least Favorite Things: Still tummy time and shots :(

~107~ Nursery Tour

I've been meaning to do a picture tour of Ethan's nursery for a while, but have been a little preoccupied these past couple months (I wonder why??) and am just now getting around to it. 

Thankfully, we had all of the essentials in place prior to Ethan's arrival, so even with him coming so early, we were ready.  

Soon after we found I was pregnant, we decided to paint and put in new carpet.  The carpet wasn't in great shape when we bought the house and a couple of dog accidents made it necessary, and we wanted to get it done early. Since we were planning to paint the entire room, Jake got that done first so that he didn't have to worry about getting paint on the new carpet.  We went with a soft grey on 3 of the walls and a beautiful teal color on the 4th wall as an accent color. This is also the wall that the crib is on.  I originally had planned to do teal if it was a boy, and lavender if it was a girl, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I really just wanted teal and didn't want lavender at all, which had nothing to do with whether or not we were having a girl.  So teal it is.  I love, love, love the color we chose and am so glad that's what we decided to go with. 

  

The carpet we went with is a grey blend and it is so soft and plush.  It's just a mid-level Home Depot brand, but we got a really good pad to go underneath (made from recycled Nike shoes), which made a huge difference. I only wish we'd had it in the budget to re-carpet the whole house!

Now that the bones of the room were set, it was time for furniture.  My parents very graciously gifted us the crib, which we ordered in white.  The nursery is not a very big room, so we chose to do white furniture to help keep the room looking open and bright. 

Our dresser was another gift-from a local radio station.  We entered a photo contest in the fall and won! All we had to do was submit a picture with a pumpkin and get people to vote for ours.  As a prize, we won a nice gift card to a local baby boutique, Suite Dreams, and a little extra cash.  On top of that, the boutique had a grand reopening sale where they gave out $25 gift cards to the first 50 customers, and offered 15% off store wide.  I was able to find a dresser that was the exact style I was looking for-on clearance-and walked out with it paying only $37.  What a steal!

Just before Ethan was born I finally had the chance to complete the crib skirt-a project I had been wanting to do for months, but never had the time (or fabric) to get it done. I finished it the weekend before Ethan was born. Oddly enough, I had quipped that I should have waited to work on it until the next weekend when Jake was supposed to be in Vegas, so I'd have something to do while he was gone.  I'm glad that I didn't wait!

For my birthday, Jake's parents gave me the rocker I had my eye on. I wasn't sure at first if I really needed a rocker in the nursery, or if one would even fit, but this one is perfect. I use it every night now that Ethan is fully transitioned to his crib at night. It's comfortable, narrow enough to fit in the space that we had for it, and I just love the chevron pattern. Even better, it has pockets on the side to hold books, burp clothes, nursing pads, or whatever else I might need. 

After my baby showers, we were able to put the finishing touches on the decorations. 

On his changing table, we have an organizer which holds his diapers, wipes, butt paste, hand sanitizer, bulb syringe, and thermometer.  We also have his Vikings pillow-pet night light that casts stars and the Viking's V on the ceiling in varying colors. We turn it on every night just before bed. 

Above the changing table is a floating shelf that holds his piggy bank, my favorite picture of him from the NICU, his board books, and wooden blocks spelling out his name. We also have a beautiful word collage that was given to us by 2 of my coworkers. 

On the right side of the window, we installed 2 gutter shelves from Target to hold his books. They're not very deep, so they don't hold a lot of books, but I like the look of them. We made sure to hang them somewhat high so that when Ethan becomes mobile, he isn't able to reach them. 

One other thing that we added was a small shelf to hold his overflow of books and humidifier. It's slightly wider than the space where we wanted it to go, but for now it works okay. I think we'll eventually move it to the closet and replace it with a single cube shelf. 

Lastly, we took the door off of the closet to allow more room for the crib and rocking chair so that we didn’t have to worry about having space for door clearance.  Inside we have 2 wire shelves for hanging E’s clothes. They are organized by size and sleeve lengths. I also have some cute elephant bins that I found at the Home Goods store. 

Even though Ethan’s room is on the smaller side, I think we’ve done a pretty good job of keeping it bright and open feeling. There’s plenty of room for his everything and I don’t feel cramped when I’m in there. There’s even enough room on the carpet in front of his crib for him to play!

Until next time, 

~106~ First Mother's Day

I had the honor of celebrating my first Mother's Day this month, and what a special one it has been. I am still in awe of lucky I am to have the most special little boy in life and his daddy by my side. 

I started out the day with baby snuggles and breakfast in bed, which was gift enough for me, but Jake and Ethan went above and beyond and really spoiled me! I got a stainless steal mug that says "world's best Mom in Korean" and a beautiful and personalized snow globe from Ethan, which I can't wait to display proudly in my new classroom.  The rest of the day followed with more snuggles, lots of movies, and more treats than a person should consume in one day-but shh, it's Mother's Day and those calories never count ;) 

The night before, I whipped up a batch of sunflower cupcakes to bring to our Mother's Day celebration at my in-laws house, but Mother Nature had other plans in mind, so they had to wait until the next weekend.

~105~ Ethan: 2 months

Believe it or not, Ethan is now 2 months old! I have no idea how that happened. Time is flying by way.too.fast.

Weight: 9lbs 0oz (59%ile)

Length: 20.25inches (33%ile)
I'm pretty sure he grew, but measuring height of an infant can be a rather tricky thing. His doctor thinks his 1 month measurement was off. 

Eating Habits: At this point he is exclusively breastfeeding, however that will change when I go back to work on May 18 (tear!) and will have to eat from bottles during the day. However, he will still be exclusively fed breastmilk. When E does get a bottle, he's easily knocking back 3oz so we're going to try upping it to 3.5-4oz and see how he does. 

Activities: We're staying awake and alert for most of the day with the occasional nap here or there. We do tummy time daily whether it's on his play mat or our chests. He's getting really good at lifting his head to look around. E's also successfully traveled to MN twice! The first time was to surprise Aunt Lauren for her 30th birthday. This was also the first time mom left Ethan with a babysitter (grandma/grandpa) and that dad was away for more than a night.  The 2nd time was for a wedding and my uncle's memorial.  He was quite the handsome stud!

Favorite Things: Mom and dad making silly faces (at least we think so-still waiting on that social smile), sleeping on mom and dad's chests, and dare I say bath time? We practice splashing the water with our hands and feet and after we're good and clean, we practice swimming (mom helps E float on his back)

Least Favorite things: Diaper changes still and shots :(

~104~Ethan Update: 1month+

I have no idea where the time has gone, but I know it's been a while since I last updated.  

It's hard to believe that Ethan will already 8 weeks old on Friday!

We've been out of the NICU for a little over a month and boy does it feel good! Ethan is doing fantastic and has turned into a great eater and sleeper.  Right now, he's only waking up once, sometimes twice in the middle of the night and going about 4 hours in between feedings.  While I long to have just 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep (I don't even know what that would feel like any more), I am doing surprisingly well with getting a lot less than I did pre-Ethan.  Check back with me after I'm back at work and see if I'm still singing that tune. 

Since coming home, Ethan has had lots of visitors.  My parents came to visit for a few days when we were discharged from the hospital, followed by my best friend, Lauren who also helped me celebrate my 30th (!!) birthday.  Local family and friends have also come over to meet the little guy and graciously brought us dinner as well.  Over Easter weekend, my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew, as well as my grandma came to meet Ethan.  It was a wonderful weekend and one I will remember forever.  We are so lucky to have so many people in our lives who love our little boy as much as we do!

Ethan's 1 month appointment was the following Tuesday.  We really like his pediatrician.  She seemed surprised that he was in the NICU for so long given that he wasn't on oxygen, IV fluids, or having difficulty with the mechanics of eating (sucking, swallowing, breathing).  We were happy to hear that he looked so good considering how early he was, but felt a little perturbed (is that the right word?) that we had to be there for so long when there wasn't a glaring reason for it.  Regardless, we're just happy to be home-healthy and happy!

Ethan's 1 Month Stats

Weight: 6lbs 13oz

Length: 20.25inches

Eating Habits: When you left the hospital, it was 60ml (roughly 2oz) and the pediatrician gave us the go-ahead to up it to 75 (roughly 2.5oz). You tend to eat every 3 hours since that was the schedule you were rigidly set on in the NICU, but you're slowly starting to create you own.  2 nights in a row you ended up going 4 hours in between (we both slept through the 3 hour mark) and the Dr. gave us the okay to stop waking you up to eat!

Activities: You like to lift your head and look at whomever is holding you when laying on their chest.  Everyone has marveled at how strong you are and your ability to hold your head up.  You're still sleeping most of the day, with a few moments of awakeness here or there.  Grandpa Hockenberry jokes that he doesn't think you have eyes because he has yet to see them. 

Favorite Things: Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner, and all of the snacks in between; Laying on mom or dad's chest. 

Least Favorite things: Diaper changes-oh the horror! And bath-time. 

One thing that I do want to note here is that it's difficult to know when exactly Ethan will do all of the things typical babies do at certain age-markers given his premature status.  Even though his actual age is 1 month, it is still almost 2 weeks before my original due date.  So align with this, doctors will take into consideration what they call his corrected, or adjusted age, which right now is 38weeks, 5days gestationally.  This means that for milestones that most babies reach around 1 month old, Ethan  wouldn't be expected to reach them until he's around or even a little more than 2 months old.  However, by the time he reaches 1-2 years old, he should be caught up in his developments with babies who were born full-term. 

Until next "month" (which will really be next week, since I'm posting this so late), I leave you with this.  Seriously, how can you not fall in love with this smile?

~103~ Coming Home!

I'm coming home, 

I'm coming home, 

Tell the world I'm coming home!

We are very happy to say that Ethan is home!  We were officially discharged on Tuesday, after 17 days in the NICU.  We had originally hoped to take Ethan home over the weekend, but a little "episode" set us back a few days just to make sure that he was 100% healthy and ready.  It was disappointing for sure to have to spend those extra days at the hospital, but we adjusted and managed none-the-less.  Although it feels like eternity now, another NICU parent wisely pointed out that in the grand scheme of Ethan's life, the days that he spends at the NICU whether it's 10 days or 100 days, are just a blip on the radar and in a few years will just be a distant memory.  Hearing that really helped put things into perspective. 

Leading up to discharge day, Ethan was subject to a whole host of tests: Congenital heart defect test, hearing test, and a car seat test-in which he had to maintain his vitals for at least 90 minutes while sitting in his carseat.  He passed all of them with flying colors!  We also made sure to take some pictures with our favorite nurses.  During our time here, we had many, many nurses work with Ethan.  Over the weekends though, we were fortunate to have the same nurses during the day and evening that really got to know Ethan and us.  It was comforting during those days to know who would be in and out of our room and to have someone that we had developed a relationship with, versus a random nurse that we only saw for 1 twelve hour shift, if that.

           Our day nurse, Tiffany             &        our night nurse, Christina

On Tuesday, after packing up our room and signing discharge paperwork, we strapped Ethan into his carseat and finally took him outside for the first time.

Once we got home, I went inside to greet the dogs and say hi.  Then Jake took his turn doing the same.  Even though we've both seen the dogs since Ethan was born, we still wanted to make sure that we said hi to them and gave them full-on attention before bringing Ethan in.  Both dogs were very curious and seemingly excited about Ethan, Viktor more so than Buckles.  Jake and I were very pleased with their response to our newest family member and looked forward to adjusting to life at home as a family of 5 :)

~102~ Being a NICU parent

We have now been in the NICU with Ethan for 11 days.  

In some ways, it feels like we've been here forever.  In other ways it's hard to believe that Ethan is already a week and a half old.   This journey has been incredible and amazing, and tougher than I could have ever imagined.  Each day we are humbled by Ethan's seemingly small victories.  We've cheered over poopy diapers, a 10 gram weight increase (that's 1/3 of an ounce), and eating an extra 5ml of milk.  We've celebrated things that other parents of newborns have probably taken for granted.  

Then there are the bigger victories that have shown us just how strong Ethan already is:
-Coming off antibiotics
-Weaning off and completely stopping IV fluids in a day
-Discontinuing phototherapy for jaundice not once, but twice.
-Increasing feedings from 30ml to 35ml, to 40ml, and now to 44ml.
-Moving from the isolette to an open air crib

Over the past week, we've found a pretty good groove and routine.  Ethan eats every 3 hours.  Between diaper changes, temperature readings, eating, and pumping, this process takes about an hour.  This leaves almost 2 hours in-between feedings to eat and sleep.  For the first week, I seemed to be managing on very little sleep pretty well.  However, that has all caught up to me now.  I long to have even just 4 hours of continuous sleep.  And this is coming from the girl who could sleep for 10-12 hours without breaking a sweat.

At Mercy, we're very fortunate to have the option of rooming-in with Ethan so that we don't have to leave him in the hospital at night.  Unfortunately, the bed, or rather couch is only big enough for one of us.  Since being discharged, I have been staying at the hospital with Ethan.  As the days have started to turn into weeks, being at the hospital all of the time gets very monotonous and draining.  I can't tell you how many times I've lost track of the day or hour.  Having visitors and talking on the phone with friends and family has helped a lot.  I've also taken time every few days to leave the hospital to go home and take a shower, see the dogs, and get some fresh air.  Oddly enough, when I go home right now, it doesn't quite feel like home.  It feels like I'm visiting someone else's home who just happens to have all of my stuff there.  I can't wait to be able to go home and be able to sleep in own bed! Jake is here as much as he can be and is doing an incredible job of balancing hospital time, work, and taking care of the house/dogs.  He is an amazing father and each time I see him interacting with Ethan, my heart melts and I fall even more in love.

The hardest part of being a NICU parent is the unknown. We never know what the next hour or day will bring.  Each blood draw, glucose check, or weigh-in has us waiting with bated breath to see if Ethan has made the progress we hope he has.  We long to bring our little man home and find a new sense of "normal".  At this point, we have no definitive timeline for when Ethan will get discharged.  All we know is that he has to gain weight and he has to eat well, without the help of a feeding tube-things that are completely out of our control; something that we're beginning to learn as new parents.  Ethan is his own little person and only he himself will determine when we get to go home.  Not us, not his doctors, not the nurses.  Ethan.  The one thing that I keep reminding myself is that as difficult as this has been and will continue to be, we are so incredibly lucky.  Ethan is not a sick baby, he's just small and early-which means he hasn't had the same amount of time that full-term babies have had to build up his fat and develop skills like eating.  Nothing that we're waiting on with him is a matter of if, but just when.  He will get there.  He will come home.  We just need to be patient...

Despite the challenges, anxiety, and uncertainty that being a NICU parent brings, at the end of the day, we're really just parents.  Parents to a beautiful, sweet, funny boy.
It is already the best title and job Jake and I could ever have.